They Don't Love You Like I Love You

The tone of the poem is intimate, with the speaker drawing the reader into something important her mother used to say to her. Yet, within the first few lines it becomes clear that the personal, intimate world of the speaker, her mother, and the reader includes the North American history of racial oppression of Native Americans. Thus, the poet demolishes the notion of what is considered personal, highlighting the fact that every personal interaction or decision is influenced by history. Just as the poet collapses the boundary between the intimate and the political, she also brings together seemingly disparate elements of playful pop culture and serious historical reality. The reference to Beyonce and the Yeah Yeah Yeahs seamlessly gives way to themes of white dominance and the violent process of colonization. In fixing all these diverse elements in a continuum, the poet makes the important point that everyone (including the reader) and everything is complicit in the marginalization of minorities.

The mother’s seemingly generic advice to the daughter “They Don’t Love You Like I Love You” can be read initially as notes on dating, especially since the speaker mentions it alongside the song “Maps,” which was written by lead singer Karen O for a boyfriend who showed up late to a shoot.